CHRISTMAS AND CLASSISM; MY MILITARY BRAT EXPERIENCE.

I recently travelled to my hometown for the holidays. Like I mentioned here, I’m not overly enthusiastic about Christmas but I’ve friends and loved ones who hold it in high regard..so let’s just say a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do.

The better part of my childhood was spent here. In a small town on the windward side of Mt. Kenya. The place I resided was fondly referred to as the ‘Base’ or ‘Kambi’- a hub for military professionals. I’ve both fond and gross memories of this place!

As a very objective young girl(as I rain praises on myself), I loved and loathed this place in equal measure. Loved it because somehow, within these walls, it always felt so safe, so warm..nothing posed a threat to safety. There was a sense of community. Most people, if not everyone, knew each other. The community was small with housing segregated into;

·         ‘Singles’/‘Koplos’(Corporals)- for young recruits just joining the camp and with no family- at least not in sight. These were situated quite a distance from the main living areas. Small neatly arranged blocks with neat lawns. I never got a chance to actually go into one of them. They were quite popular with hormone-raged teenage girls- many a tale has been told of ‘love’ stories gone wrong in those quarters which were 99% male populated in the ‘90s.

·         ‘Wooden’- like the name suggests, these were built of wood. Small houses by the outlook. There were just three blocks  of them. By the side of a road- they stuck out like a sore thumb.

·         ‘Block Mzee’- this literally translates to ‘old blocks’. These houses were 2-bedroomed mid-sized flats. Most had a sickening pale orange colour, others were awash with light brown, others pale green- I never liked those colours. Their stairways were dark, windows were minimal, shattered easily. The spaces were just right. These belonged to junior officers in the military; corporals and senior privates with small families. Irony was, though, they always had children in the droves. I never quite understood the numbering of these but I know there was Block 1-21, and some numbers were missing e.g. I don’t quite recall a block 11 or 12. Ps..i’ve nothing against block ‘mzee’. In fact, my best friend lived at ‘Block 18’ of those flats.

·         The ‘labour camp’- this were self-contained bed-sitters for constables and their families

·         Married Quarters- these were 3-bedroomed, houses. There were 6 flats in each block and they belonged to mid-level officers; sergeants, Snr. Sergeants, 2^nd grade warrant officers. There were 15 of them; block 30-45.

·         ‘Warans’- these was actually ‘warrants’ but what I’ve written there was how everyone pronounced and still pronounces it. Spacious houses for warrant officers. These were close to most amenities; the church, supermarket (AFCO), shops, the dairy, the pool, the barber, the cobbler etc. If you lived anywhere else and had your parents send you, say to the mend a shoe at the cobblers, you always had the chance to stop by the church to say a prayer and hope your Snr. Private dad would rise through the ranks so you could move house to warans and avoid the long trek to the cobblers!

·         ‘K’- I sincerely have no idea what this ‘k’ meant or stood(will ask tomorrow) for but I assume these were for older warrant officers.

·         ‘Officers’- these were maisonettes and bungalows for junior and senior officers who’d begun their service at cadet level. This was also where the ‘Base Commander’ resided.

I think you get the segregation picture without going into too much detail.

I also loved this place because apart from the high security zones and aircrafts which I loved to watch, there were values held or at the very least implied. The many cultures of Kenya were adequately represented and this is partly the reason I’m rather unbothered by tribalism- I’ve mingled with all. Off course stereotypes existed(like a rumour about my Turkana friends mum being a night runner or the Kamba guy called Kwinga who’d bewitch you if you picked fruit from his trees at the labour camp). Also, living in the base somehow molded us into very resilient personalities able to adapt to most situations.

Kids were respectful to their elders(smh..like they had a choice with all the military discipline wafting in the air). Parents other than your own treated you like one of their own. People attended weddings for the food and to give their 2-cents on the bridal parades gowns and pitched tent at funeral wakes to give support to the deceased’s family. Tw’s a like small city, self-contained, to say the least. I loved some of the base rituals such as the bugle call during which the flag was lowered and all were expected to stop their activities and stand at attention..lool.

I loathed(ok, perhaps loathe is a bit too strong) it for many a reason. Sometimes, parent’s had to move from one base to another and this, for a growing girl like me, meant loss of some dear friend’s (off course by then I barely understood seasonality nor longevity of friendships). Also, there was a revocation of base privileges upon reaching certain ages or if your folks left the service which basically meant access to the base to reminisce or reconnect with one’s places of growing up was difficult.

However, the ranks and divisions which ran down right to the kids were my biggest headache. Military classism. It’s almost as if you were always safe ‘within your own ranks’. Wives always breathed a sigh of relief when their husbands were given a promotion which entailed moving house to match your rank. Ranks were(I believe, still are) a serious thing. Today, though, I’ll focus on what they did to my Christmas’.

At Christmas, there’d be annual ball for the parents and a ‘kids party’ for their children.

There would be a kid’s party for each level of the ranks. Nothing bothered me as much as this did. I had friends in all ranks and this just meant I’d not be seeing them at the party if our dads were in different ranks. Also; they wouldn’t get to see my fab ‘princessy’ dress while it still reeked of its new scent or my mini face-lift from the tight pigtails on my head! (Narcissism becomes me).

This was and still is very wrong, if it’s not been amended; we attended school together, went to the same churches, drank milk from the same ‘boma’, played the same games on the weekend, consumed the same supplies(Darn I miss those canned pineapples), received the same healthcare at BMC(base medical centre), went through the same check-point at the ‘main gate’, got our hair braided by the same women, mama Shiro or Mama Munira, or shaven by the same barber etc etc  My friends were a lot of fun and it’s such a pity we never partied together as kids because of conditioned lifestyles imposed by societal ranks.

Ranks are great. We all strive pretty hard to get to the top of our games. Ranks are a responsibility- the higher the rank, the more the responsibility. However, kids are just that, KIDS and it’s pretty irresponsible that we should drag them into those ranks when it comes to things as trivial as parties. Parties are celebrations, meant to draw people closer not segregate them into hierarchies and especially not kids- don’t spoil it for them; they should be let free to be the kids they are especially if living in a community as ‘closed’ as the one I and many others lived in.

Merry Christmas folks. Thanks for keeping me company on the blog.

Xoxo,

The military brat- Kazini Daily!

STYLE FEATURE: PITBULL

There is nothing more attractive, to me, than a well dressed man with wits to boot!
Armando Christian Pérez aka Pitbull is one such man, well-dressed and musically gifted.

My friend Wamuyu has time and again criticized me for my 'obsession' with this mans looks/style.

No man can ace rocking a suit in any colour as well as Pitbull can. This musical genius can pull of egg yellow, green and red in one ensemble and still manage to look darn good!!!!(Ok, perhaps my choice of colours there is OTT but you get my flow right?)

I find Pitbull very attractive(Do you??!!!!) and what is this thing he does with his lower lip *sighs*. I sound like a slip of a girl with a crush, huh?

If you haven't already, read about his musical journey here.

Here are some of my favorite looks from this icon;
Guys, take a cue..,

What do you think of Pitbulls style??

Xoxo,
Kazini Daily.

BURNING BOATS..,

I sincerely have no idea when or how this happened but I did not realize we were in December(My tummy knotted-if this makes sense- when my brother pointed it out). In between trying to make sense of the things I've been preoccupied with, I somehow lost track of time. Time flies. Ah. *sighs*

I'm not a huge fan of December and Christmas that falls within this month. Perhaps its the cost implication (or maybe not as nothing pleases me more than spending and splashing the extra coin to feed my savvies) or the once-a-year pretense that is the 'spirit' that encompasses it. Everybody everywhere 'giving' because it's apparently a time to give and remember those who do not have a thing..oh what bullocks! PS..I do not have the front bench at church-its apparently for elders/ushers-but before you think it, no, I'm not an atheist.

Giving should not be relegated to 'one' season. It should come as second nature as is the love we are born with- love is innate(Hatred is triggered, learnt). We should be able to give not because we have so much we've nothing to do with it but because we can in the much or little we are endowed with. We should always give, where giving is justified and called for.
Give. Give. Give.

After Christmas, the new year beckons and with it resolutions top among them weight loss and the urge to mend the wrongs of the previous year or better yet, to supersede  the achievements of the previous year.

Today, we tackle resolves. The resolves many will seek to make and probably write down as a check point to keep them accountable.
A resolve, to me, is a strategy. An approach that seeks to better the present situations.

Alexander the Great comes to mind whenever I think of resolves.
I like Alexander the Great. Tales about him make my days.(As do those of one  Hernán Cortés.)

One particular tale stands out, though.
Whenever either of them took their troops out to the battlefield, they would burn their boats. This was to prevent them from reneging on the ultimate goal(s)/intent of the war..WINNING.

It was a DO or DIE situation.

This tale resonates well with me because I love to see things to the end. If and when you start something, you should set its goals and see it come to fruition.

By burning his boats, Alexander committed his men to victory over the Persians, who far outnumbered the Greeks in great numbers.

“Strategy is all about commitment. If what you’re doing isn’t irrevocable, then you don’t have a strategy — because any­ one can do it. That’s why burning the boats is so important. Treat life like you're an invading army and there is no turning back.”(Troy Tyler)

I'm certain a lot of resolves will be made this month and toward+at the start of the year,2014.
This is an early heads up to come up with a resolve you're willing to see to the end-
BURN the boat for it and every other project you intend to undertake.

Finally, in the 'spirit' of giving, here are a few splendid outfit ideas for your end of year work parties/cocktails:-)

I think this is a splendid idea especially if you are hosting.

African print dress for an edgy look

Elegance in length

 

Which one's your favorite??

Image Credits: Here, Here
Buy here, here

Xoxo,
Kazini Daily!!

YOUR NETWORKS= YOUR NETWORTH

A close friend of mine recently told me it was imperative I realized the people who are on my side as I endeavor to achieve the goals I’ve set out for myself in my 5-year plan(Yes my good people, I have one of those. It entails a short list of things I, with God’s grace in tow, hope to achieve within that time frame.). People, who genuinely care about you, have your back even when you hit rock bottom. This kind of made me think of networking. Relationships mean a lot if you’re looking at getting to the top of your game in whatever field.

Today’s musing is based off of one of my favorite reads Victor Cheng(..,and by extension Porter Gale). It has been my intention to share this with you but I only remembered about it when my friend sat me down for that pep talk. Also, the piece was 11pages long- had to scale it down to 3 with the points I thought were most important! Enjoy!!

******************************************************************

A lone ranger mentality works fine in school, but as you get further into the real world, relationships matter a great deal. In life, you need to know someone, who knows someone not in the unconventional manipulative scheming all too common in ‘job corridors’, government offices and the like but as a way to “build relationships” by being yourself and being generous to others.

The quality of your life (in all aspects – career, personal, financial, etc…) very much is correlated with the relationships in your life. Both types of relationships (career and personal) are PRICELESS.  Building relationships with others provides them with value. Value can be anything the other person might find useful – giving useful advice, introducing them to another person, helping them with their career, etc.

1. APPROACH NETWORKING AS TRANSFORMATIONAL, NOT TRANSACTIONAL.

Networking should NOT be viewed as a series of transactions.

The old way to network involved climbing a ladder for individual benefit. The past was about competition, pursuit of materialism and “keeping up with the Joneses.”

In today’s model, networking IS transformational or an inside game first.

What I mean is that you first must identify any barriers (e.g. negative thinking, fear of public speaking) standing in your way from connecting, and define your values, interests and core purpose.

Once you’ve identified any barriers, you can focus your efforts on meeting people that share your passions, and your networking should feel conversational and not awkward or confrontational.

Networking based on values and passions is not only more natural, but is also the basis for building a strong network foundation, enabling you to reach a higher level of success than you would on your own. 

2. DEFINE YOUR PASSIONS AND PURPOSE WITH THE FUNNEL TEST.  

 

Companies with lucid and succinctly described visions are more likely to succeed than those with unclear or highly complex visions. Some companies spend hundreds of thousands of dollars defining their brand positioning, core values and vision. Yet as individuals, we often don’t take the time to clearly articulate our own passions or purpose.

Imagine that you have five floors of elevator stops and you need to convince someone to hire you while you ride up together. Or you are given three minutes on a stage in front of your peers and you have to describe your personal mission.

What would you say? How would you create a memorable connection? To help you define your passions and purpose, I’ve created a simple test that I call "The Funnel Test."  

Step 1 is to define your three greatest passions, or a succinct set of words that clearly define your core interests.

You can put a high priority on any type of passion, from family to fitness or education to the environment.

The area where your three passions overlap is your sweet spot. If you can find activities, work, or relationships that combine two or more of your core passions, you are likely to hit the jackpot and be more effective in and excited about your actions and activities.

Step 2 is to define your desired tone.

How do you want to present yourself to the world? What is your authentic voice? Are you quiet and reserved? Witty? Bold? Irreverent?

Now fill the space below your passion circles with a selected word for your tone. Like a funnel, where the contents flow from top to bottom, envision all of your actions being influenced by your tone. Remember, simple is good.

The last step of The Funnel Test is to define your core purpose in twenty words or less.

What do you want to accomplish in life? And work?

Write what is in your gut, and look at the passion words in your Funnel Test. Your goal is to write a phrase of fewer than twenty words that describes your purpose.

Once you’ve defined your passions and developed a focused purpose, your networking efforts will be more effective and authentic. Use this test as a filter to help you guide your activities and meetings.

3. Focus on “Give Give Get”

 

The last concept I’d like to share is about the power of helping others i.e. “Give Give Get”- put greater energy into giving than receiving.

I believe the key to unlocking the hidden power of connections is helping others when you don’t expect anything in return.  A focus on giving can transform your emotional state, improve your relationships, build your happiness quotient, and teach you the importance of gratitude.

If you put giving back and helping others at the center of your networking and relationship building, you are likely to have more impactful and stronger relationships, among other benefits. What you will find is that the giving will come back to you tenfold.  

Remember to look inside first, outside second. If you focus on your passions and reorganize your networking around your values and beliefs, you will discover the kind of lasting relationships, personal transformation, and, ultimately, tangible wealth that are the foundation for happiness and success.  

Help others, be of service, live each day fully, and, remember,  

source: Porter Gale. 

images: Google

******************************************************

What’s your approach to networking?

Xoxo,

Kazini Daily!!

MY HUSTLE: BARBARA& 1923

Meet Barbara Onianwah.  A Client Service & Digital Marketing manager in an Ad Agency by day and professional make-up artist and blogger when duty calls.

I have known her for the past three years and even though we’ve never met, we are constantly in touch as I harangue her for advice on products I need to keep my face clear and relevant in this arena where first impressions are very important<..,you do know that’s the first step in their assessment of ‘first impressions, right? Gbam! In your face! Literally.>

My consultations have been via twitter and with 100% success rate, all products she has recommended I use have been spot on!  She’s also responsible for the rather expensive brow job I caused furore about on my Facebook page while in Lagos..hehehe(my eyebrows usually set me apart the equivalent of $1 in Nairobi but Ms. Barbz sent me to a parlour in Lagos where they cost me a whopping $27).PS.. The job was just as good as what I get done in Nairobi..lol.

 It’s a pity our schedules have always clashed whenever I’m in Lagos and we are yet to have a personal encounter.

If there’s an enterprise whose growth and journey I have followed, its Barbara's. She started out posting simple photos from her phone of herself wearing make-up and constantly giving reviews of various products in the market. Occasionally, she would host live sessions on twitter where she’d engage her followers on a make-up related topic every week. She sought out information from industry leaders and would occasionally be seen retweeting new trends in the industry.

A few months later, Barbz set up her Facebook page and one ‘like’ after the other has grown it to gain relevance as a voice in the make-up artistry realms in Nigeria and slowly but surely gaining follower ship across the continent and world! She also set up her blog, Barbara&1923, to post more detailed information on her daily make-up looks.

Fast-forward 2013, Barbara’s name is now synonymous with make-up artistry and is constantly doing make-up for weddings, celebrities not to mention writing articles on the same on big platforms such as Bella Naija and StylJunki among others.

I love Barbara’s story because she has pursued what was once a hobby and turned it into a creative enterprise that not only chips into her growing bank account but also puts a smile on the faces of her clients. She is the epitome of patience and resilience..even when her online presence was but a drop in the ocean, Barbara kept on and did not hesitate to post on her favorite topic(take a cue Roselyn, take a cue. Note to self&others: Regular posting does wonders.)

Here are some of her looks and work:

Check out her blog and follow her on twitter /facebook as well to keep in the loop of new make-up trends, product reviews, do’s, don’ts as well as her natural hair journey and finally her alter ego who you just gotta love, Barbara the fashion blogger.

Barbz the Fashion Blogger

If you need some of her magic for a special occasion or your big day (..,when the boo decides to place embargoes on the direction I throw my winks and smiles at, at least make-up will be the last of my worries), email her here.

E-mail me here if you'd like to be featured on  'my hustle'.

Xoxo,
Kazini Daily!!

STYLE FEATURE: CURVES AND CONFIDENCE

I love going scrounging the net for outfit inspirations whenever I get the time. Today, I'd like to share fun work outfits from one of my favorite bloggers;Curves and Confidence. I relate to her style mostly because we have more or less the same body type. I love the way she blends in bold as well subtle colours to create timeless looks that could work pretty well at the work place.

Take a look..,

Great style, right? These are just but a few of my favorite looks. You can 'stalk'(lol) her HERE for more inspiration.
Xoxo,
Kazini Daily.